On Hiatus

Due to circumstances in my life changing massively in the recent past, and looking to be pretty up in the air for the foreseeable future, I'm going to be putting this blog on hiatus for the next few months. I (and recently, the ever-helpful and funny Jen) have provided about 500 gift ideas so far, and while it's interesting and fun, it's also a time commitment that I just can't maintain right now.

Fear not, however: I'll bring the blog back towards the end of the year, so you can all have fresh, new ideas for Christmas, Hannukah, Kwanzaa, Solstice, Saturnalia, or other winter holiday gifts. Until then, take care and happy gift-searching!

Days of the Week Magnets

I'm always losing track of all the little appointment cards and other dated bits of paper I get my grubby paws on, so I inevitably nearly forget about something I'm scheduled to do. While I could hire a professional personal assistant to take care of this, I suspect it would be much cheaper just to get a set of Days of the Week Magnets and keep all my appointments sorted by day on the fridge. $12.99 USD.

Dotty Egg Cup

From Jen: "If you start out your morning right with a four minute egg (not four minute eggs) then this piece of dishware is a must have! Whether you are very British, snobbish or so cool it hurts to breathe this Dotty Egg Cup is a stylish accoutrement to your morning. In addition to being dishwasher safe this cup matches an entire set of fine china! Dotty china all around!" $12 USD.

Feminist Chicks Dig Me T-Shirt

Jen writes: "Let us seperate the men from the real men. You must like a) American-made cars, b) football (not that silly soccer) and c) smashing beer cans on your forehead. Now that we have settled that, we must clothe you with what only a real man can wear (or at least one with a great sense of humor). The Feminist Chicks Dig Me T-Shirt comes in an attractive blue with white script that is sure to show off your awesome pecs. Make sure you strike a pose near all aforementioned chicks and babes so they may revel in the glory that is you." $19.95 USD.

Nutrition Facts Onesie

Packed with peanuts, babies really satisfy. The incredible, edible baby. Baby: it's what's for dinner. We've all been told many, many times throughout our childhood just how delicious and healthy babies are to eat, but do you know exactly what they contain? When you see one wearing this Nutrition Facts Onesie, you'll know just how to fit a nice, healthy portion of baby into your diet. Mmm, baby. $30 USD.

Cat Grass Plus

From Jen: "Veterinarians all agree that your aloof, cool-eyed cat will go ga-ga over some Cat Grass Plus. Many cats have a green tooth (dogs too) and with this kit you can satisfy them while keeping your precious houseplants safe, especially that one your mother-in-law gave you. With only a little water, the Cat Grass grows in about a week to serve and aid your kittykat's digestive system and it cuts down on the frequency of furballs." $2.77 USD.

Weekly Medication Manager

Are you on lots of medications, always taking yet another tiny tablet to help take care of one of your body's numerous aches and pains? Well, if one of those pills is a memory aid to help you remember when to take your pills, maybe this Weekly Medication Manager would be a good idea. It has seven pillboxes (one for each day of the week), each with four compartments, and a programmable timer that lets you set four unique alarms each day to remind you to take your pills. Now you don't need to remember anything ever again! But I suggest you try anyway. $19.95 USD.

Octopus Wallet

Just in case you still haven't come across a wallet you like despite the numerous possibilities I've posted here in the past, here's yet another option to consider: this Octopus Wallet is cute and creative, and will happily hold all your cash, cards, and coins. Also available in two other designs. $20 USD.

Backyard Safari Bug Vacuum

Jen writes: "If you have very curious children and/or spouses, the Backyard Safari Bug Vacuum is for you. This battery powered, adjustable vacuum comes with bug capturing capsules with built-in magnifiying glass for further investigation of specimens! The bug vacuum is also a humane way to free your creepy-feely friends back out to nature in case you are out of the cardboard and cups. Now if only there was a button that cooked the bugs and covered them in chocolate, sigh." $14.99 USD.

Keychain LED Lantern

People have, it seems, been making various keychain-attachable light sources since keychains were invented. From the time the first cave-people put a lock on their front door and attached the key to a ring, they probably found some way to also attach a burning torch to it. I imagine this caused problems due to flammable pockets. Anyway, if you're one of those people who goes a lot of dark places with your keys, here's yet another way to light things up: a 2-inch Keychain LED Lantern that emits a powerful glow and has a battery that will last for 25 hours. Plus it has a blinking mode to signal the aliens. $9.99 USD. (Via Gizmodo.)

Fables

From Jen: "From the twisted mind of Bill Willingham comes yet again another visit to classic fairy tales in the form of the graphic novel, Fables (Vol. 1: Legends in Exile). Having left their homelands for the safety of the New World, our favorite characters such as Snow White, the Big Bad Wolf, and other lesser-knowns are citizens of the Big Apple. An adult romp through the stories of our youth, this graphic novel is sure to please you or your friends but keep it from the grubby hands of toddlers!" $9.99 USD.

Tabletop S'Mores Maker

From Jen: "Why it has taken me so long to share this gem with you is beyond me but everyone knows graham cracker plus chocolate plus toasted marshmallow equals s'mores. And everyone also knows that s'mores equal all that is good in a democratic society. The Tabletop S'Mores Maker comes with a toasting grill, stainless-steel lazy susan, ceramic ingredient holders and toasting skewer. Perfect for a small gathering and yes, I bought one for my parents and my boyfriend's parents. So begone campfires, sticks and oddly-bent coathangers!" $29.99 USD.

USB Piggy Fan

During these lazy, hazy, crazy days of summer, it can get pretty darn hot sitting in front of a computer. A fan can help keep you cool, but most fans just aren't hideously tacky enough for those of us who want to seriously offend the aesthetic sensibilities of our coworkers and friends. This USB Piggy Fan, though, is just weird enough. Why a pig? Why a spinning palm tree? Who knows. $12 USD. (Via Gizmodo.)

Notice

Blogger has started requiring word verification (CAPTCHA) when posting, to try and eliminate machine-generated spam-blogs, and as a result, my autoposting script that kept this blog updated on a strict schedule no longer works. For the foreseeable future, posting will be irregular and sporadic; I'd like to apologize, since I know you've all come to expect a steady flow of gift ideas.

Furgle Speakers

Regular speakers are so dull. Who wants to listen to music coming out of boring grey or black plastic boxes? Why settle for that, when you could have a pair of these Furgle Speakers sitting happily on your desk, looking goofy and fuzzy and cheerful while you listen to your new Alanis album? Yeah, you definitely know what's hip and stylish. £23.99 UKP. (Via Gizmodo.)

Y: The Last Man

Jen writes: "The fantasy of many men: to the the last man on EARTH with tons of babes. Yet for escape artist Yorick Brown and his monkey Ampersand, the last two creatures holding a Y chromosome, life is extremely hard. Follow the two men as they travel with the mysterious Agent 355 hounded by the crazy Daughters of the Amazon. Y: The Last Man (Vol. 1: Unmanned) is written by the brilliant Brian K. Vaughan and drawn by the talented Pia Guerra, this comic's story arc is presented in the nicely compact and wallet-friendly graphic novel form!" $10 USD.

Blue LED Faucet Light

Jen writes: "Thanks to a simple faucet attachment bad-assery can now be bought! Once attached (universal adapters included), the Blue LED Faucet Light turns on as soon as you twist your faucet handles making the most common day water hip through the power of illumination. Think of geek as the new chic like the 1960s swingers with revolving wall furniture. No news on when work for the Yellow LED Faucet Light will commence." $14.99 USD.

Water Bottle Bike Repair Kit

Isn't it annoying when you're riding your bike along, just minding your own business, and some jerk comes up and grabs your water bottle and takes a drink before you can stop them? That happens all the time to me. So I got myself this Water Bottle Bike Repair Kit, which fits in my water bottle holder but contains, instead of cool, refreshing water, a bunch of wacky metal tools for repairing your bike. Next time that guy grabs my bottle, he'll get a mouthful of screwdriver bits and hex wrenches! Ha ha! Serves him right! $19.98 USD. (Via Gizmodo.)

Wonder Woman

From Jen: "Wednesday, june 7th represented another milestone in the world of DC Comics as they unveiled and shipped out their latest take on the classic heroine, Wonder Woman. Originally a liberated model for women left behind to work in mens positions during World War II, Wonder Woman was watered down and even lost her powers during the 1960s. In this new story arc, "Who is Wonder Woman" they reveil which woman is behind those bullet-defecting bracelets (I like to call them cuffs myself). This new comic will be a treat for long-time fans and great for new readers!" $2.99 USD.

Naughty Bits

"He pulled her to him," "her tongue darted out," "eliciting a strangled moan." If these phrases don't immediately make your knees tremble and your lips quiver... well, okay, they're just phrases. But they're hot little phrases, and you can get them and others on Naughty Bits pins, designed to bring forth inappropriate thoughts in all who read them. (To see the list of pins, scroll down the page. Not all phrases are still available, but you can request duplicates of ones that have been sold.) $8 USD.

Dove's Detox Tea

Jen writes: "If you are a vegan and therefore live mainly on fibrous breads and fruits of the forest (unless you are one of those french fries and Doritos vegans), you can probably pass this tea up since your body is probably purer than a mountain stream. For the rest of us with our colorful sweets, fried delicacies, and juicy bacon, sometimes we experience stomach problems. Less powerful than an enema but tastier than Pepto, Dove's Detox Tea will promote regular bowel movements and is a great subsitute for coffee featuring ingredients like chicory, cinnamon, red clover and orange peel." $4.25 for a 1 oz. bag.

Lilly Bean Play Food

As we go about living our felt lives, combing our felt hair and washing our felt faces, going to our felt jobs in our felt cars, sometimes we start feeling a bit down in the dumps. That's when we need comfort food, and this Lilly Bean Play Food is just the thing. It's an entire felt meal of delicious felt dishes that will fill our felt bellies: mashed potatoes with felt gravy, a felt chicken drumstick, felt green beans, and a felt slice of pumpkin pie. Mmm, feltastic! And best of all, it's handmade by a gourmet felt chef when you order. $28 USD. (Does the word felt look weird to you now?)

Shredding Scissors

Do you have lots of incriminating worthless documents around that need shredding, but you're trying to operate your evil lair office on a shoestring budget? Buy a few pairs of these Shredding Scissors for your minions employees instead of a regular shredder, and they'll take care of any and all papers you have that need shredding. No longer will your heroic adversary business competitors be able to get their hands on your plans for world domination business secrets by going through your trash. Hooray! $17 USD, but you may have to know Japanese to successfully place your order. (Via Gizmodo.)

Pupcakes T-Shirt

Jen: "While I do not think the average shopper appreciates the synthesis of warm pastry treats and small mammals, you, dear madam or sir, are not the average shopper. Display your love for both by wearing this Pupcakes T-Shirt on your birthday until the next or until it rots off your body. Seriously, people love dedication like that, it will get you the promotion. One word: pupcakes." $33 USD.

Flashing Spike Ball

This ball is made of soft translucent rubber, is covered with spiky points, and when you squeeze it, it starts flashing in numerous different colors. I'm really not sure what to call it. Glowy pointy thing? Light-up angular blob? Ah, I know. Flashing Spike Ball. $15.60 USD for 12, or cheaper if you buy in serious bulk.

Tattoo Rubber Stamps

Jen writes: "I remember as a child the kitsch and crafts of Michael's and other art supply stores. In an effort to be crafty I would often make stationery and invitations using paper and rubber stamps. Yet, I yearned for something other than butterflies, balloons and sappy-eyed creatures of the forest. Now, twenty years later, the ultimate in Tattoo Rubber Stamps can be found online! Now, everyone will know how bad ass your slumber party will be!" $6.99 to $14.99 USD, available in dozens of cool tattoo designs.

Stuffbumps

This ingenius little storage solution is great in many ways. When empty, it stays completely flat, it's unique mesh design allowing it to collapse completely upon itself. But when you want to store stuff, the mesh stretches outwards, transforming it into a spacious and handy pouch. Stuffbumps are made from recycled cardboard and natural felt, and hang easily on walls, doors, or anywhere that you've got some flat vertical space. A great solution for cramped living spaces. $19.99 USD.

Vintage Wallpaper Pendants

From Jen: "The absolute gaudy nature of my Grandma Permilia's kitchen wallpaper is burned on my corneas. Imagine my surprise to find a peice of said vintage wallpaper now being sold in these charming Vintage Wallpaper Pendants! Complete your favorite vintage outfit or blend in seamlessly with Aunt Zora's boudoir." $27 USD.

Tire Watch

Jen writes: "A good watch is hard to find and with Father's Day coming up, nothing says I love you like a durable rubber time piece. Made from an old tire the Tire Watch is sure to remind ol' Dad of his days burning rubber down on the drag." $40 USD.

Sumo Soap Holders

When I think of sumo wrestling, I think of personal hygiene. The two just go hand in hand! That old phrase, "Cleanliness is next to sumo wrestling," didn't just come out of nowhere, you know. These Sumo Wrestler Soap Holders are cute and fun and will hold your bar of soap in a big way. $10.95 USD.

Jesus Pan

Finding an image of Jesus on a piece of toast used to be a real amazing occurrence. Some even called it a miracle! But nowadays, images of the Christ are no big deal, thanks to this Jesus Pan. Simply cook up your favorite type of food in this pan, and voilá, it'll have Jesus' divine face cooked right onto it! And once Jesus-foods become commonplace, everyone will have to look elsewhere for Jesus. Maybe they could check a church or something. $29.95 USD for two. (Thanks, Roger!)

Fertility Pouch

Jen writes: "The next time you are hobknobbing and smoozing it up with the fat cat execs do not forget your Fertility Pouch. Fortune 500 members will bow down in awe at your canny sense of sexual know-how combined with vinyl accessories." $20 USD.

Time Cube Clock

While I freely admit that I am educated stupid, do not know the truth of nature's harmonic simultaneous 4-day time cube, and that I will die singularity stupid, my brain lobotomized by evil educators, that has nothing to do with this Time Cube Clock, which merely uses rotating cubic sections to indicate the time in an interesting and unique way. $15 USD. (Via Boing Boing.) If you don't know what I'm babbling on about, check out this other Time Cube. You'll thank me.

Hand-Spun Yarn

From Jen: "For the man, woman or child in your family that enjoys knitting (and feels they must make you a knit accessory for every occasion) Insubordiknit creates one-of-a-kind Hand-Spun Yarn. No longer will your scarves be a drab brown or socks a putrid orange. With names like Spider Death and Carnival Scab, these skeins feature varying widths and types of yarn but all are so so soft." Prices vary. $0.50 USD per yard is typical.

Pirate String Doll

If someone told me, "Check out these dolls! They're handmade in Thailand using just a single piece of string!" I'd yawn and tell them to come back when they find something really impressive. But when they add the word "pirate" to the mix, I immediately start paying attention. This Pirate String Doll is truly awesome, with his eyepatch and sword, and will fill your life with swashbuckling excitement if only you'd buy him. Oh, and there are a bunch of other string dolls, too, if you're lame and not so keen on pirates. $9 USD.

Abusive Stamps

When you want to quit your job, it's always a great idea to try and go out with a bang. These Abusive Stamps will certainly help you out, by not only clearly communicating your feelings ("This is F**king Urgent" screams one of them) but also most likely really making your boss mad. Impress your soon-to-be ex-coworkers with your moxie, and let people know exactly how you feel with these offensive but powerful stamps. $7 USD.

My Name Is... Glasses

If you keep having parties with lots of identical-looking glasses, my friends and I just aren't going to come to them anymore, okay? I'm sick of being at your party, and setting down my drink for a minute, only to go to pick up and realize that I don't know which one it was. That's just so frustrating! Get yourself a set of My Name Is... Glasses that let you write your name directly on your glass with a wipe-off marker, and then maybe I'll drop by your next get-together, okay? Good. $27.95 USD.

MaxScratch

You'd think that by now, with all that humans have managed to do with science and technology, we'd have figured out how best to scratch our own backs, right? Well, finally, we have. It's called MaxScratch, and it's perfectly designed to scratch your back in just that scratchy way that no scratcher before has ever managed to scratch Better than a stick, better than a ... other long scratchy thing, not quite as good as a friend or partner with fingernails. $9.95 USD.

The Xipper

Sick of trying to open the plastic wrap on CD and DVD cases? Fret no more, sore-fingered friend, for here is The Xipper, a tiny, stylish, and durable tool designed specially for this frustrating task. Simply push down to engage the tiny blade, then slide the Xipper along the edges of the case to slice through the plastic. $7.95 USD. (Via Gizmodo.)

Trick or Bacon Card

From Jen: "I think this Trick or Bacon Card gives people the true essence of Halloween or any day out of the year. Give me bacon or I will toilet-paper your entire house and I know there was rain in the forecast. Bacon comes in many forms: full size strips, bacon bits, uh and many, many others. You know what, I think I could use some bacon right now." $3.50 per pair.

Pizza Plates

Kids and grown-ups alike will love it when you serve slices of pizza on these Pizza Plates that come in a clever cardboard pizza box. Just make sure your guests know when to stop eating, or you'll have to buy another whole set of plates. $22 USD.

Cool Jewels

There's no better way to add bling on a budget than by creating your own beautiful, sparkling gems... from frozen juice or water. Cool Jewels are made in a specially-shaped ice tray, can be any color you want (if you've got some food coloring handy), and will make your guests' drinks totally pimped out. $8.95 USD. (Thanks, rude!)

Casette Belt Buckle

From gift-scout Jen: "Feel good about reusing precious materials like those self-help tapes with this "sveet" Cassette Belt Buckle from SveetCoutoure.com. If old tapes on sexual fulfillment or weight loss are not your bag, try the music collections with greats like New Kids on the Block, Milli Vanilli, or dare I say — Wham!" $15 USD.

Maya Dust Campfire Starter

Bah, who needs matches? Get back to your roots — your ancient, pre-zippo roots — with this Maya Dust Campfire Starter. By showering it with sparks with the included flint and steel, you can make this highly combustible wood dust flare up quickly, starting any campfire easily. $3.99 USD.

Tassel Purse

So many purses and handbags look alike these days. Even carrying one with a designer label only does so much for your image. Why not save some money, and look fashionably unique to boot, by getting yourself a Tassel Purse? These purses, handmade from high quality, gorgeous fabrics, each have a distinctive design that makes them stand out. $35 USD.

Pop Art Camera

From Jen: "Teach your children the value of modern art, especially pop art, with this fun Pop Art Camera. In the style of the great Andy Warhol this baby produces a photo with four slightly different prints with four wildly different hues." $12.95 USD.