Tangle Tamers i-Spring

While we've previously featured two different tangled-headphones solutions on this blog, both of those require you to carefully pack up and put away your ear buds when you're done listening. What if you just don't have that kind of time to spare? If you just want to be able to take your headphones off, toss them in a bag, and go, then maybe the Tangle Tamers i-Spring is the item for you. It's a super lightweight spring that you wind around each of the wires of your headphones, keeping them straighter (and less tangly) than usual. Available in nine beautiful colors. £5.99 UKP. (Via Gizmodo.)

Giant Paper Clips

At some point in everybody's life, there comes a time when we must make the difficult decision: how do we fasten giant pieces of paper together? Since I couldn't find a giant stapler or a giant binder, we'll all just have to make do with these Giant Paper Clips. Four inches long by one inch wide, these are big enough to accomplish many giant tasks: affixing giant coupons to your giant shopping list, tying to a string and using to catch giant paper fish with giant magnets on them, linking them together to make a giant bracelet, etc. How hugely useful! $7.50 for a box of 20.

Medieval Writing Set

Hark, deare Gentil Readeres! I hath fownd a gyfft so symple, so ylegante that nonne shuld let yt falle by the waysydde but rather oghte to seize yt wythoute further delaye! Hmm... while I'm not too good at writing in Middle English, I bet I'd get a lot better at if if I had a Medieval Writing Set. It includes a roll of parchment paper, a blue goose quill pen, and a bottle of blue ink. Anyone interested in the middle ages would enjoy having this and being able to practice writing the way scribes, poets, authors and playwrights of old used to. $25 USD.

The Chestnutter

Spring is here! Do you know what that means? The sun is shining, flowers are blooming, birds are singing... and it's the time of year for roasting fresh chestnuts over an open fire! However, as we all know, before you roast a chestnut you have to make an incision in the shell to allow steam to escape, which means tedious, potentially dangerous work trying to cut through a hard shell with a kitchen knife. The Chestnutter eliminates this difficulty by providing a simple method to just squeeze and cut an X-shaped incision in any chestnut. Hooray! Now if only Jack Frost would stop nipping at me. $29.95 USD.

Arm Candy Sweatshirt

Sometimes marriages aren't about love: money and social standing often come into play, and sometimes you just marry someone so that they'll look good standing next to you. Here's a gift for a guy who's still devilishly handsome even after all these years: this Arm Candy Sweatshirt will proclaim to the world that he knows you just married him for his looks, and he wants more than that! Funny and complimentary, it's a great gift for any husband with a sense of humor. $26.95 USD.

Yoga for Regular Guys

Today I'm featuring a pair of gifts for guys. Guys are notoriously hard to shop for, so hopefully this will help someone out with that task.

Yoga is a type of meditational exercise that's good for everybody, but many guys have a hard time getting into it. Who's a better person to convince them that they might enjoy it than three-time World Champion Wrestler Diamond Dallas Page? In his book Yoga for Regular Guys (with a foreword by Rob Zombie), he leads guys through all the steps of a good yoga workout, keeping things amusing with his biting humor and wit. If this book won't get a guy to at least try yoga, nothing will. $12.97 USD.

Gummi Stick-On Lenses

One thing that high-end professional SLR cameras had over smaller, cheaper digital cameras for a long time was their ability to use different lenses to make sure the shot you're taking comes out just how you want it. Well, throw away your $1000 camera, 'cause these Gummi Stick-On Lenses for cameraphones have changed everything. Now with your cameraphone you can take close-up macro photography, wide-angle outdoor scenes, stylized vignettes, or photos enhanced with other wacky effects. Just stick 'em over your phone's lens and snap away! £14.95 UKP for six lenses. (Via Gizmodo.)

The Ex Knife Holder

This was going to be one of yesterday's extravagant gifts, but then while searching, I found it for much cheaper than its usual price. Is there someone in your life who drives you absolutely nuts? A nagging boss? An oh-so-perfect acquaintance? An infuriating ex? Imagine their face as you stick your kitchen knives into The Ex Knife Holder, a morbidly humorous person-shaped knife holder that will definitely inspire conversation and help de-stress your life. Because what's more satisfying than knifing someone through the head? $59.99 USD. Thanks, Amanda!)

WarmX Heated Undershirt

Our second extravagant gift is great for anyone who has trouble keeping warm on those cold winter days. Whether they're living in the frozen north, fans of chilly outdoor winter sports, or just afflicted with an inability to regulate their body temperature, a WarmX Heated Undershirt will undoubtedly keep them feeling toasty. Made by weaving conducting threads throughout the fabric, these battery-powered shirts "makes possible for our customers to feel well and to move freely at low temperatures, also in professional or in private life." When ordering, it would be useful to be able to read German. €248 EUR and up. (Via Gizmodo.)

No-Touch Paper Towel Dispenser

It's time once again for Extravagant Gift Monday! Today we've got two really neat and really pricey gifts that anyone would be excited to receive.

Our first gift is a cool hands-free way to keep your kitchen clean and reduce the spread of germs while you're at it. It's the No-Touch Paper Towel Dispenser, a fancy motion-activated dispenser sort of like the ones you see in public restrooms these days. But this one has a twist! Instead of just dispensing a pre-measured amount of paper towel, it's adjustable. Put your hand in front of the sensor, and the paper towel begins to roll out of the machine. Then, move your hand across the front of the machine, and the cutting blade follows your hand, slicing the paper towel at the exact point you desire. Now that's luxury! $299 USD. (Thanks, Vito!)

Torture Device Coloring Book

These days, we adults are constantly hearing about torture in the news, but it's usually given in purely abstract terms. Stress positions? Hooding? What exactly is going on in this torture? I think our inability to understand this stems from our lack of early childhood education in torture. This Torture Device Coloring Book would certainly have helped us out. Don't let your child end up as clueless as you are about what goes on behind closed torture-chamber doors! Help him or her learn all about the interesting (and fun!) devices used for torture! While just 61% of Americans think torture is sometimes justified, 100% think this coloring book would make a great gift. $8.84 USD.

Waffle Stack Necklace

I know how much you love waffles. It's obvious! The way your eyes light up when you see them, the vivacity with which you tear into them as soon as they're put in front of you, the expression of sheer delight that comes over you as you take that first bite. Yes, you, my friend, are a waffle lover. Show your fondness for griddle-fried breakfast foods with this Waffle Stack Necklace. It's a beautiful short stack of waffles with a pat of melting butter and drenched in maple syrup. Dangle it proudly around your neck, proclaiming to the world, "I love waffles!" $18 USD.

Zippo Pocket Ashtray

While I think it would be best for people and the environment if no-one smoked cigarettes, I'm realistic enough to know that that's not going to be happening anytime soon. However, a more reasonable goal, and one that I think we might be able to achieve, is to get rid of cigarette-butt litter all over our streets and sidewalks. Get a smoker you know this Zippo Pocket Ashtray, in a sleek brushed steel, so that when they're smoking and have nowhere responsible to put the butt, they can just stick it in the ashtray, close it up, and carry it with them until the next time they find a garbage can. It's a simple and inexpensive way to help clean up the world. $9.95 USD.

The Tinpod

I don't usually post iPod accessories here, even though there are about a million different ones on the market, but this one is just so attractive and unique that I felt it deserved a mention. It's The Tinpod, a beautifully decorated tin container for your iPod, with holes on the bottom for your headphones to plug into. You'll definitely have a case like no-one else if you pick up one of these (limited edition) cases, and it'll keep your iPod safe and sound. $16.95 USD. (Via Gizmodo.)

Self-Stirring Cup

I like to make drinks that involve one or more ingredients on a regular basis. Coffee just isn't quite right without, say, cream, and what is orange juice without vodka? However, as I've established in the past, I'm really amazingly lazy, and I often can't be bothered to do all the stirring necessary to mix these components of my drinks together. This Self-Stirring Cup solves this problem nicely. With merely the push of a button, it'll mix up whatever's inside, leaving me free to enjoy my beverage without worrying if it's stirred enough. Now that's a load off my mind! $22 USD. (Via Gizmodo.)

Mop Slippers

Many of us just don't have enough time in our busy, busy days, between all the intense lounging around and dedicated goofing off, to engage in mundane tasks like keeping our floors clean. As a result, we live (lazily and comfortably) in giant mounds of filth. But that can change! Simply get a pair of these Mop Slippers, comfy footwear with cleaning mop fibers on the bottom, and every time you make the arduous trip between the couch and the fridge, you'll be cleaning the floor a bit! They're machine-washable, too. $9.95 USD.

Nyokki Pets

Similar to the Egglings featured here last November but significantly cuter, these are tiny egg-shaped ceramic planters that look like cute little animals. They're Nyokki Pets, and they come in five different styles: frogs and chicks (as pictured), as well as monkeys, pandas, and piglets. The included rye grass seeds will grow to full height in as little as two weeks, and then you can trim and style to your heart's content, and it'll keep growing back! $19.95 USD for two. (Via Gizmodo.)

Andean Mother Earth Figures

Do you enjoy living on the earth? Well, for the time being, it's the only planet we've got, so we ought to treat it with respect and do our part to help conserve it. These Andean Mother Earth Figures are hand-carved in Bolivia, and are said to bring good fortune to your home. Plus, purchasing them will help save the South American rainforests! $12.95 USD for the small one, $14.95 USD for the large. (Thanks, Sarah!)

Drink Hold 'Em

Are you clumsy and liable to wreak havoc in your house with the merest movement? Is a drinking glass standing on a table an invitation for you to knock it to the floor, destroying it? You could definitely use a Drink Hold 'Em, an adjustable plastic drink holder that attaches securely to the edge of a desk or table, keeping your drink securely out of harm's way but still easy to grab when you want to guzzle. It's also quite useful when you just don't have enough table space for your project because your drinking glass is in the way. A smart, simple solution to an annoying problem. $14.99 USD. (Via Gizmodo.)

Blossoming Teas

Most of the time when you make tea, it's from some unattractive dried-up little bits of who knows what that look wholly unappetizing no matter what you do with them. However, Blossoming Teas are different. Created by hand, the blossoms are a bundle of tea leaves and dried flowers tied together in just the right way so that as they steep in hot water, the bundle unfolds, creating a beautiful underwater floral sculpture as it brews a delicious beverage. How cool is that? £2.95 UKP. (Thanks, Stephanie!)

Adventure Paper

If you're the hardy outdoor type, a person who loves hiking, sailing, mountain climbing, or other nature-filled activities, you'll often need a map of where you're going. Unfortunately, in the intense conditions you'll be in, regular paper just won't cut it — it'll get wet, the ink will run, the paper will tear, and you'll be out of luck. Adventure Paper aims to make these inconveniences a thing of the past: it's waterproof and tear-resistant, so anything you print onto it, map or otherwise, won't run or get destroyed if the paper gets wet. $19.95 USD. (Thanks, Vito!)

Starfrit Securimax

Have you ever accidentally cut your finger on the sharp edge of an aluminum can lid, and then wondered whether you'd managed to contract tetanus or hepatitis or some other devastating disease? Well, you no longer have to have this particular worry. The oddly-named Starfrit Securimax is a can opener that does its job by cutting the can along the side, leaving no sharp edges, and allowing you to use the top of the can as an effective temporary lid. It's a simple yet tremendously important update to an everyday kitchen tool, and I know I definitely want one of these! $19.99 CDN. (Via Cool Tools.)

Man-Bashing Punching Bag

There are many men out there who suck. Unfortunately, sometimes you end up spending some time with one of them for one reason or another, and after it's all over, you just need to take out your aggression. While actually hitting people is frowned upon in our society (unless you're a professional athlete), hitting large inflatable objects is usually okay. This Man-Bashing Punching Bag is five feet tall and features a lovely diagram of an anonymous man, with helpful directions: "Punch him here," "knee him here," "kick him here." Take out your aggressions, burn a few calories in the mean time, and enjoy the release of tension. $24.95 USD.

USB Massager

Sitting in an office chair all day isn't the most comfortable thing, and as many, many office drones know, comfort is important to maintaining good health. One way to relieve your tired, cramped muscles is by using this USB Massager. With a nicely textured rubberized surface, it'll gently vibrate away your aches and pains, leaving you feeling fresh and invigorated for more hours upon hours of mindless keyboarding. Hooray! $9.95 USD. (Thanks, Gunther!)

OUCH! Voodoo Doll Toothpick Holder

Does inflicting pain on others bring you great joy and happiness? Is schadenfreude the only German word you know? Then the OUCH! Voodoo Doll Toothpick Holder might be just the thing for you. Shaped like a poor little guy lying flat on his back, it's designed to hold a few dozen toothpicks all stabbed painfully into its body. Laugh evilly as you fill it up before a party, and then cackle quietly to yourself every time you refill it, and it'll ensure any get-together is at least amusing to you, you sadist. $6.99 USD. (Via Gizmodo.)

The Food Loop

I've never personally made any meal that requires me to tie it down before I stick it in the oven. However, I know that this sometimes happens, as I've seen it occasionally on the Food Network. It always looks like a fiddly process, getting the strings wrapped and tied just right so that they don't slip off. The Food Loop aims to make this a simpler process. It's a food-safe space-age cord that wraps around your food and locks together with ease, holding things tightly without having to tie any finicky knots. If you're the type of chef who makes a lot of these crazy tied-up meals, this is definitely the product for you. $15.95 USD. (Via BoingBoing.)

Egg Shapers

Do you like your eggs over easy? Poached? Sunny side up? How about... rabbit-shaped? Yes, you heard me right! Now, through the miracle of modern science, utilizing such cutting-edge technologies as, uh, nanothermology and biogenetics or something, you can make your eggs look like simple shapes! This is blowing my mind. Get yourself a set of four Egg Shapers and get scrambling. No more will you have to suffer through the indignity of unshaped eggs! The future is here! Seize it! £3.99 UKP. (Thanks, Gunther!)

Oh! My Glass

It's pretty darn frustrating to sit down to a nice cold beer (or bottled soda) and realize you've left the bottle opener in the kitchen. You can just hear it taunting you, saying "don't you wish you could open that up?" Or maybe I'm the only one who hears kitchen utensils speak. Anyway, you can eliminate this frustration from your life by getting an Oh! My Glass, which has a bottle opener built right into its base, allowing you to open the bottle, pour it, and drink it without a moment's pause... as long as you remember the glass before you leave the kitchen. $12 USD. (Via Gizmodo.)

Boudoir Door Sign

We all know you need your beauty sleep, your highness, but how are we supposed to know when it's safe to knock on your door? How can we, your loyal subjects, avoid accidentally waking you from your royal slumber? Perhaps consider hanging this elegant and effective Boudoir Door Sign on your doorknob, to let us know (with suitably refined grace) when it is appropriate for us to call upon you and when we should go about our business, leaving you to your rest. $7.99 USD.

Preggie Pop Drops

While I'm not currently (and never have been) pregnant, I hear that morning sickness is quite the unpleasant experience. If you are pregnant, or know someone who is, maybe you should consider getting some of these Preggie Pop Drops, sour fruit drops containing a mixture of essential oils designed to reduce nausea and dry mouth and give you an energy boost. Even if they don't entirely eliminate morning sickness, they can at least alleviate it a bit and make life a little nicer. $5.50 USD.

Lumen Tree

In my exhaustive search for any and all unique, interesting, and thoughtful gift ideas, I almost always find items that I can joke about in one way or another. However, today I seem to have come across an item so simple and beautiful that my wit is powerless against it. The Lumen Tree is a stainless steel sculpture with an oil lamp for a base, so when it's lit in a darkened room, a beautiful and intricate shadow is cast on the nearest surface. (Also available are lamps featuring nesting birds on a branch or a flock of flying birds.) $48 USD.

Big Bad Boomin' Bugs

When you're a kid, catching ugly little bugs and then staring at them up close is a fun activity that can fill hours of time. Who here didn't have a magnifying glass used to burn inspect every tiny bug they came across? For kids these days, though, the technology has really improved. Take the Big Bad Boomin' Bugs, for instance: not only does it keep your scientific specimens captive under a giant magnifying lens, but it also contains a sound amplifier so you can hear every noise the little critter makes! Combine that with its simple-to-use bug scooper and you've got a fantastic way to learn about the world around you through its icky little denizens. $17.99 USD. (Via Boing Boing.)

Teastick

It's time to eliminate the unnecessary waste of disposable teabags from your life, and learn to appreciate the rich, delicious flavor of loose-leaf tea. While many devices for making loose tea are less than great — holes so big that bits of tea escape, hard to wash, etc. — this Teastick is both beautiful and simple to use. Just put the tea leaves in the top and hang it over the side of your mug. When it's done steeping, take it out, slide up the mesh, and dump the spent leaves into your compost bucket. $18 USD. (Via Treehugger.)

Aerolatte

While lots of people enjoy a delicious, frothy latté, most of us don't have an actual latté machine in our house to make them with. That's when gadgets like the Aerolatte come in handy. My sister gave me one of these a while ago, and boy, is it ever fun! I just heat up some milk in the microwave, whip it up for a minute with the vibrating frother, and then add some very dark coffee. The end result, while maybe not coffeehouse quality, is still delicious and foamy. $10.99 USD.

Hog Wild Motorized Ice Cream Cone

It's hard to decide which of the seven deadly sins are the most fun, but I'd have to say that sloth and gluttony are certainly up there. Now you can engage in both with this Hog Wild Motorized Ice Cream Cone! Is actually turning the cone just too much work? Do you wish you could just hold the ice cream near your face and devour the whole thing without so much as a twist of the wrist? Use this device, and all you'll need to do is push a button and the ice cream will spin merrily while you sit back and enjoy the sweet, creamy deliciousness of life. $9.95 USD.

Bead For Life Jewelry

Jen writes: "Bead for Life is a foundation working with the displaced ethnic groups like the Acholi and others in the Kampala region of Uganda. The socially and environmentally conscious consumers will be happy to know that Bead for Life has employed over 150 families to combat the destrucrtion of war, HIV/AIDS and poverty by creating beautiful, affordable jewelry from recycled magazines. Turn that Wired into a beautiful bracelet for Mom!" You can pick up the three-strand bracelets pictured or your choice of other beautiful Bead for Life Jewelry at their online store. $5 to $25 USD.

Pill Taker's Cup

Are you one of the slightly unhealthy teeming masses in this world who is forced to take a big ol' pill of some sort every day? Whether it's a multivitamin, calcium supplement, or something to clear up that rash you discovered last Tuesday, swallowing massive pills is never fun or easy. That is, until you try it with this Pill Taker's Cup. Simply place the pill in the small holder just beneath the rim, and then take a drink as usual. The liquid lifts the pill from its resting place and washes it directly down your throat, easy as anything. Buy it now! And good luck with that rash. $3.98 USD. (Via Gizmodo.)

Vegetarian or Vegan Wristbands

When Lance Armstrong began selling his "Livestrong" wristbands to raise money to fund cancer research, he was doing a noble thing for a good cause. Little did he know the idea would immediately be seized upon by pernicious money-grubbing capitalists who would create wristbands in every color proclaiming everything from "OZZY RULES" to "I LIKE SQUID". These Vegetarian or Vegan Wristbands can help you proclaim your veggie-munching proclivities to the world, by saying "Look! My green wristband is slightly unique, and green! Like broccoli!" £2.50 UKP.

Ping Pong Calendar

With a totally retro-hip style straight out of a 1970's-era Good Housekeeping magazine, the Ping Pong Calendar is a useful item with a unique flair. Since you set the month, date, and day by hand, it'll remain usable for the forseeable future (unlike most paper calendars), and with its bright blue and chartreuse colour scheme, it'll clash with nearly any tasteful decor! $34 USD.

Acrobat Vase

Do you know anybody who's always nervous? Someone who tries to make everything just so, and for whom a big mess is a serious tragedy? An Acrobat Vase is the perfect gift for them! With a rounded bottom supported by a small ceramic disc, these vases will remain upright, but roll unnervingly around in circles anytime a breeze blows or someone walks past. It's enough to drive you crazy! $20 USD.

Egrips Appliques

If there's one problem with today's teeny-tiny (yet still expensive) electronics, it's that many of us have large, clumsy hands. Stop dropping your iPod and your digital camera, and buy yourself some Egrips Appliques, adhesive sheets of rubbery plastic in many attractive colors that you can stick to your gadgets to help save them from premature death by falling. Available in all sorts of pre-cut shapes and sizes, or you can just get a full sheet and cut it yourself. $3.95 USD and up.

Wooden Pinball Game

I still cling to the fanciful notion that, somehow, actual solid wooden toys are all a kid needs to stay entertained, even in this modern age of portable videogame systems and mp3 players. That's why I recommend getting this Wooden Pinball Game. It's simple: you just launch the ball using a springloaded stick, and then let gravity determine the ball's fate. After you've launched them all, you add up your score, and then it's the next person's turn. I look to you, dear readers, to prove to me that kids can still be simple and pure! Buy this wooden game! Won't somebody please think of the children? $17.95 USD.

London Underground Card Map

The London Underground, or "loo", is a large and confusing place that even native Londonians have trouble finding their way through. Help out your British friends (or "bobbies"), or anyone traveling to London, by getting them this London Underground Card Map. The size of a credit card, it fits handily in any wallet ("boot") any will be helpful to any subterranean traveler. £7.50 UKP.

Wheat Penny Clock

Coin collecting can be a truly fun hobby. There's nothing like finally tracking down that last rare nickel to complete a set, and there is simply no thrill as big as finding an 1887 skewed-obverse standing Jefferson half quarter at a yard sale. Show your numismatist friends that you don't think their hobby is all that strange by getting them this Wheat Penny Clock. Because, as we all know, it's always time for collecting coins. $13.99 USD.

Bacon Strip Bandages

Everyone knows (maybe) that when you have a black eye, you can help it heal by placing a raw steak over it. The steak really has nothing to do with the healing; it's just the coldness of the meat that makes the difference. Still, placing these Bacon Strip Bandages over your small cuts and scrapes will definitely help them heal faster and will look deliciously meaty to boot. Watch out for hungry passersby, though. $4.25 USD. (Thanks, Louisa!)

Lemon Blueberry Pancake Mix

Breakfast, we are often told, is the most important meal of the day. It's important to eat a hearty and healthy one to start your day off right and keep you going throughout the long hours until your midmorning snack. This Lemon Blueberry Pancake Mix, direct from the Dancing Deer Baking Company of Boston, MA contains nearly everything you need to whip up a spectacular batch of delicious fruity pancakes (or waffles!) in no time. Serve them with a pat of butter and a puddle of maple syrup, and you've got a morning meal that can't be beat. $7.50 USD.

Knitted Cat Toy Patterns

Intrepid reporter Jen was looking for knitting projects for cats, since her feline friend is bored and needs a new craft to keep busy with. Unfortunately, it turns out that cats can't really knit (cursed lack of opposable thumbs!), but since humans can, we might try using these Knitted Cat Toy Patterns to make some handy colourful toys to keep our cats busy. $5 USD. (Thanks, Jen!)

Unbreakable Wine Goblet

When a company bills something as "unbreakable," don't you immediately feel the urge to figure out a way to break it? Maybe it's just me. Anyway, Hammacher Schlemmer is offering this Unbreakable Wine Goblet made from bulletproof glass, with the promise that you can use it anywhere it would be hazardous to use regular glassware. It's one of a set, so if you really need to serve drinks to clumsy people standing over hard surfaces, you can be sure you won't have to spend your time cleaning up glass shards. $24.95 USD.

Ice Cream Ball

Here's a fun activity for the upcoming summer months: make your own ice cream in a fun and novel way (and only 20 minutes!) with this Ice Cream Ball. Simply place ice cubes and rock salt into one side of the ball and the ice cream ingredients (cream, sugar, flavors) into the other, and then roll or toss the ball around for a while, and when you open it up, it'll be full of fresh, homemade ice cream! $29 USD. (Available in six fun colors: red, orange, green, blue, pink, and purple.)

Deflexion

What's cooler than a board game with cards, tokens, or little plastic houses? One with laser beams. Deflexion pits two players against each other in a bid to defend their pharaohs from the cunning laser attacks of the other player. Each player moves small mirrors around the board, in an attempt to reflect the laser's beam onto the other player's pharaoh and protect their own. A fun and really cool high-tech game that anyone who enjoys strategy will love! $39.95 USD.